A Magical, Mystical Christmas Party

I hope you will mark your calendars and plan to join us for our annual Sunday School Christmas Party on December 17 @ 6:30 p.m. We are thrilled to have a commitment from the great magician the Magical Holmdini (Marty Holmes) to provide some interesting entertainment for our party. The sign-up form will be available in Sunday School and will be sent out via e-mail later this week.

The Thrill of Hope--Zachariah's Story

I hope you all enjoyed a wonderful Thanksgiving Holiday with your family. Cindy and I drove to Baytown several times, but we were able to visit with my parents and family, with our girls, and with Cindy's Mom and family. This week, we had Cindy's sister and her husband join us in College Station for some culture--we took them to see "A Tuna Christmas."

In the two weeks prior to Thanksgiving, we have been watching Andy Stanley's series on "TIME." We will return to this series for the final three messages after the Christmas Season. However, beginning this week, we will be looking at Andy Stanley's series called "The Thrill of Hope." This is a message series leading us to the celebration of the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ. This week's message is called, "Zachariah's Story."

Andy reminds us of the many Christmas Mornings that we experienced as children in which the waiting for that special day seemed to be unbearable. It seemed as if Christmas would never get here. Do you remember those days? Do your children now wait anxiously as you and I once did? Andy uses this illustration to explain the promise of the certainty of Christmas Morning and how the dynamic of waiting....waiting...waiting... set up the first Christmas. There were a group of Jewish people who lived their lives waiting everyday for the fulfillment of prophecy which promised the delivery of a Messiah. These devout Jewish believers had been living this way, waiting for the Messiah for hundreds of years, yet still waiting and expecting the Messiah to appear in their lives. Certainly, they began to experience that feeling that many of us felt as we waited for Christmas Day when we were youngsters...when will it EVER get here? Even in our Christian Experience, we may feel the same emotions that the Jews who were expecting the Messiah certainly felt at some point. After waiting and waiting, God seems to be quiet. He seems to be so silent that we begin to question and may actually doubt.

Then, in Luke, Chapter 1, beginning in Verse 5, we see the story of a priest and his wife who "walked blamelessly in all the commandments and requirements of the Lord." We see the story of an angel appearing to the priest and promising a son who would become the "forerunner" of the promised Messiah. Yet, this promise of a son appeared to be highly unlikely when one considered the age of the parents and the years of infertility that had haunted them throughout their married life. Yet, the story of Zachariah is a story of God's promise being delivered. It is an example of how God can be trusted to deliver what He promises.

Christmas is also a reminder that your faith in God is not misplaced. God pays attention and is moved by and blessed by those that remain faithful...even when the waiting seems unbearably long. After hundreds of years of waiting, God sent a Messiah on that first Christmas night. Halleujah! Christ, the Savior is born!

Sunday School Class Christmas Party--December 17

You are invited to our annual Sunday School Christmas Party. The party is scheduled for December 17, 2011 at 6:30 p.m. I hope you will all check your calendars and set aside this time if possible to join your friends and colleagues in a time of fellowship and enjoyment. The party will be at the home of Cindy and Jimmy Creel, 8431 Turtle Rock Loop. We will be sending out additional information in the weeks ahead, but our current plan is to provide chili and tortilla soup and have maybe a few other main dishes and then have others bring side dishes and desserts. We always have a great meal and the fellowship we enjoy is outstanding. There will be a few games and lots of door prizes. It is hard to attend without winning something!

I want to make a special invitation to those of you who have joined our group recently. This is a great opportunity for all of us to get to know each other better. I hope you will all attend if you possibly can.

Jimmy and Cindy Creel

AT CAPACITY--November 20, 2011

Thanksgiving is on its way. Christmas won't be far behind. Our calendars are filling up quickly. The Christmas parties and shopping and family get togethers and church activities and special events are about to engulf our lives. All of these things--or at least most of them--are good things that enrich our lives. Yet, they also contribute to our feeling of being overloaded and unable to accomplish everything that needs to be accomplished.

In last week's lesson, we recognized the indisputable fact that we all have a limited amount of time. In view of that fact, we agreed that a good question to be asking in lieu of "What time is it?" would be the question, "How are you spending your time?" The implication of this question is that we should be spending our time doing things that honor and please God.

In this week's lesson, Andy Stanley illustrates the principle of priortizing the important things in life by using a familiar demonstration of big rocks and smaller pebbles being placed in a glass container. Most of us have seen the demonstration before. Yet, it continues to illustrate a very important point: The key to getting more productive is to prioritize.

Your priorities determine the capacity of your time. As we watched the illustration, we saw that when the big rocks are put into the jar first and then the smaller rocks representing the details of our lives are poured in, they all fit nicely into the glass container. When the smaller pebbles are given priority and placed in the container first, there is not enough room to get all the big rocks into the container.

What are the big rocks in your life? Certainly, your spouse and your kids would be considered "big rocks." Your job would be a "big rock." In order to identify all the big rocks in your life, simply ask yourself the question, "What do I view as important and who do I view as important?"

Andy makes a good point when he says, "Business destroys intimacy." We economize our relationships as we add, add, and add to our lives. For example, our relationship with our kids and our spouse will suffer if we continuously allow the demands of our job, our golf game, our hunting habits, our night out with friends, our bridge club, or any other event or combination of activities prevent us from spending quality time with our family on a regular basis. We live in a culture that seldom forces us to prioritize correctly. Unfortunately, most of us can look back a a time or season of our life when we could have done this better.

Priority determines capacity EVERY single time.

In both the Old and New Testament, we are taught to put God in the jar FIRST. Putting God first influences the priority of everything else in our lives. The Biblical equivalent of the word "priority" is really the word "seek." In Psalm 63:1, we see David committing to seek God earnestly. Psalm 119:10 makes reference to David seeking the Lord with all his heart. In Proverbs 28:5, we are told, "...those who seek the Lord understand all things." Matthew 6:33 encourages us to seek FIRST the kingdom of God and His Righteousness. This means to invite God to be the organizing principle around which everything else revolves in our lives.

Andy challenges us to accomplish this priority in a simple manner. He suggests that we give God the first few minutes of every day and that we seek His guidance in the organization and priority of our day. Since the first few minutes of our day can often set the direction and pace of our day, doesn't it make sense to spend these minutes with the Lord? Andy suggests modifying the Lord's prayer to meet our own unique personalities and experiences and to use this as a pattern for communicating with the Lord every morning. He emphasizes the need to thank God for our protection, provision, and for the pardon of our sins.

You are seeking SOMETHING first. Why not let it be God? If we re-orient our time around God's will, He will make us productive as we honor Him. As the Holiday Crunch arrives this week, let's make an effort to prioritize our lives around the will of God. Will you join your Christian brothers and sisters in the coming weeks of Holiday Cheer and Goodwill in putting God first and allowing him to re-prioritize everything else in your lives? You may experience the best Christmas season ever if you are able to truly make God your top priority.

REMEMBER--NO SUNDAY SCHOOL CLASS NEXT WEEK. On December 4, we will begin looking in earnest at the Christmas Story, beginning with the story of Zechariah and the birth of John the Baptist.

The Time of our Lives--November 13, 2011

This week, I completed a new book written by Tom Brokaw called "The Time of our Lives." I found the book to be a thoughtful and provocative discussion about the changes that have occurred in our lives since the early 1950's. For example, Tom asks this question of his own parents, "How many shirts did you own in the early years of the 1950 decade?" Their answer was, "Not very many." Yet, when I look in my closet, there are so many shirts that I am not sure I could get another one in the closet, and I don't really think I am the exception to the rule. I think our lives have changed. As I was finishing this book, I also began preparing for Sunday School this week. I ran across a series by Andy Stanley called "Time". As I thought about the TIME of our lives and the general concept of TIME and considered the issue of TIME as we begin the holiday season, I concluded that it might be a good idea to take a couple of weeks to consider some Biblical guidance on this matter of TIME.

This week, we are going to share Andy's message titled, "Your Days Are Numbered." Andy makes the point that we are always aware of the time. We often ask the question, "What time is it?" He suggests a better question, "What am I doing with my time?" Keep in mind that your time is running out. The older you get the faster it seems to go! Andy introduces the concept by looking at some verses from Job: Job 7:6 and Job 9:25. He explains that at some point in our life, usually in our forty's, we quit thinking about how old we are and begin to think about how much time we have left. We begin to think, "If I am going to do something, I had better do it now." Andy even introduces us to the website: deathclock.com
Deathclock.com asks you to fill in some information about yourself and then purports to tell you when you will die. Here's a tip: if you choose to visit this website, be sure to consider yourself an optimist. It will make a huge difference in your predicted date of expiration.

Andy suggests that we begin to live our life with the end in mind. He refers to the words of Moses in Psalm 90. Moses spent forty years running from the Egyptian authorities in the wilderness taking care of sheep. Yet, Moses was used by God to lead His people out of slavery to the promised land that God set aside for His children. From everlasting to everlasting, we live between the bookends that God has established. Your life and my life is brief, common, quick and it is futile for us to try to create something more meaningful without seeking God's purpose for our life. Andy suggests the following prayer for each of us to begin living our life as if our life has a point to it and we are not it!

PRAYER: "Heavenly Father, teach me to number my days that I might gain a heart of wisdom and fulfill your purpose for my life."

When we begin to view our lives within the context of living between the bookends of everlasting to everlasting, we find purpose in our lives. As we approach the holiday season and begin to "deck the halls", lets pray for God to help us live a purposeful life--a life dedicated to honoring the God of the Universe.

Prayer Requests and Announcements November 6

This morning, we were made aware of a family in the Angel Tree program with multiple children who desire a basketball goal for Christmas. Since this request is somewhat outside the regular gift parameters for Angel Tree, our class agreed to finance this gift. We collected slightly more than $100 this morning for this purpose. We may need to take another collection, but it appears that we are close to being able to pay for this gift already.

Prayer Requests from this morning:

Pastor Christ Osborne--heart attack

Stephanie and Fred Matthews in the loss of her grandmother recently.

Jewel Clift--Jimmy's friend's 92 year old mom who fell and broke her pelvis.

Kathleen's mom has had several falls with difficlty in recovery and healing/ also in need of a meaningful and enjoyable job. i

Miles--Luke will be undergoing procedure to place tubes in his ears.

Tammi Collins--Mother will be undergoing knee replacement and sister is recovering from an ankle injury.

Craig's grandmother as she recovers from pneumonia.

The Woods family in their recent loss.

PRAISE: Sheryl Lowe made us aware that the mother of one of our Upward Football players for whom we have been praying after she suffered a stroke several weeks ago actually was able to attend the Upward Football Game this week. Thank you Lord!

Please keep these in your prayers this week and remember the Promise of Peace with God as the perfect gift of Christmas.

Have a great week.

Jimmy

Promise Keeper--November 6, 2011

WOW! It is hard to believe that it is November and some semblance of fall weather has actually shown up in the Brazos Valley. We have enjoyed some gorgeous weather in recent days and we are even beginning to see some fall colors--along with the browns of trees dead from the drought. As November commences, our thoughts naturally turn to Thanksgiving and then, to the Holiday Season! In our Sunday School Class, we got a jump on the Holiday Season by studying lessons during the past three weeks that actually come from the Christmas Story in the Bible. The focus of the Christmas Story that we have been studying is a little different from the focus of Christmas Stories to which most of us have been exposed in the past. These past few weeks, we have been looking at the genealogy of Jesus as presented by the apostle Matthew. Matthew himself was an outcast--a tax collector, one of the lowest of the lowest in the heirarchy of Jewish social circles. As such, many people were amazed when Jesus called this lowly, despised tax collector to follow Him. Not only did He call Matthew to follow Him, but He actually went to Matthew's home and dined with Matthew and other associates who were likely as low on the social ladder as Matthew himself. Jesus' disciples must have wondered if their leader knew what He was doing? They must have asked themselves how Jesus could invite such a degenerate to be part of His inner group? Here was a guy who paid the Roman government for the authority to take money from the Jewish citizenry virtually at his own discretion! It was almost like legalized theft. Now, Jesus was inviting him into the inner circle? What could He be thinking?

For that reason, Andy Stanley suggests that Matthew must have taken special comfort in underscoring the unlikely, undesireable, and undeserving characters whom God chose to play important roles in bringing His Son into this world. In this week's lesson, Andy Stanley points to a character that is most closely related to the name of Jesus in the long list of contributors to the linneage of Jesus. This individual caused 85 priests to be murdered! He ran around on his wife! He fathered a child out of wedlock and then took extraordinary steps to cover his sin, leading to the death of one of the king's most loyal and committed warriors!

This week, the Christmas Story focuses on the role of David, a man described in the Bible as "a man after God's own heart." Yet, we see in this week's lesson that David was a sinner in every sense of the word, a failure as a leader, failure as a father, failure as a friend, and failure as a husband! Yet, God uses David to accomplish His Great and Wonderful Plan for the salvation of all men! Indeed, we see in 2 Samuel 7:8 that God actually promises David that He will make his name great--like the name of the greatest men on earth. God made this unconditional promise to David and he was and is faithful to deliver on His promise. Even though David sinned and his sin was great, God was willing to forgive David. David suffered the consequences of his sin, but God was willing to forgive and still honored his promise to David.

When God makes a promise, He keeps His promise! Matthew was about to tell the story of an unconditional promise sealed with blood. God would keep his promise to mankind just as He kept His promise to David. Every Christmas for the rest of your life, when you hear the "town of David," I hope you are reminded of the promise God made to David and the promise God made to you! God promised peace! The only way to have peace with God is for Him to remove sin. Jesus came to remove your sin. You can't have the Promise of Christmas until the obstacle of peace (sin) has been removed. The unconditional promise of God is that you can have peace with God. The Promise of Christmas, Peace comes when we finally embrace the Promise of the GIFT--forgiveness of sin--obstacle removed. The Promise of Christmas is Peace for all mankind. Silent Night! O, Holy Night when Christ was born!

The Unexpected Christmas--The Label Makers Week 3

As we have studied for the past two weeks, there are people all through the family tree of Jesus whom you and I would not expect to be there based on their actions, reputations, and history. As Matthew, the tax collector begins to launch into The Greatest Story Ever Told, he seems to take particular pleasure in underscoring the "R" rated members of Jesus linneage--the unlikely characters that God chose to help bring His son into the world. We have seen and will continue to see that all through history, God has chosen to distribute His grace to those who did not deserve it. In Matthew 1:1, we see yet another example. Rahab, the harlot was listed in Matthew's reiteration of the family tree of Jesus. Rahab wasn't even Jewish. She was a Cannanite woman whom Matthew reminds, had a reputation that was tainted throughout life and history. Surely, this lady of the night, this immoral Cannanite could not play an important role in God's plan? Surely, God would not choose such a character to be part of His plan to save the world?

Yet, in Joshua 2:8, when God's spies were studying the city of Jericho for the next conquest by God, we see Rahab taking these men into her house and hiding them from those who would like to kill them. We also find that the Hebrew word that Rahab used to identify God was a word for Lord that was not spoken by some and was only used in written form to refer to the God of the Universe. Rahab chose this particular term to refer to God, literally meaning "the existing one." God clearly had a plan for the conquest of Jericho so that it would be abundantly clear who should get the credit for this great victory--God. Believing and non-believing scholars alike have agreed that, for whatever reason, at the end of the day, the walls of Jericho collapsed. In the midst of the chaos that followed, God spares one family because of the faith of one Cannanite prostitute. How unlikely is that? How can we understand why God chose Rahab? Later, we find that Rahab and Salmon marry and have a baby named Boaz. Boaz eventually marries Ruth and their great grandson is actually King David of the linneage of Jesus! Rahab had a label, Rahab, the harlot. Yet, she played an important role in bringing our Savior into this world!

If the truth be told, probably most of us have a label. Sometimes labels are based on secrets, sometimes on habits, and sometimes on poor decisions. Yet, Rahab's story is much like our own story. When we think about approaching God, we realize that we all have some kind of label, Jimmy, the jerk, or Carrie, the coveter, or Larry, the luster, or Allen the addict. Yet, Jesus invited all kinds of people to follow Him while they were still wearing this label.

This Christmas season as we think about what Jesus did for each of us, let's rethink our approach to God. Instead of thinking about what I did (went to church, read the Bible, gave an offering, helped the neighbor, etc.), let's realize that God decided before the foundation of the earth to pay for the sins of all who wear labels regardless of what that label is. This Christmas, let's discard the "If I don't, then God won't" approach to God. Instead, let's approach the newborn Savior from the standpoint of the grace and mercy that He has offered to each of us. God offers each of us a new label. Lord, teach me to live my life in accordance with who YOU say that I am. Joy to the World!

The Unexpected Christmas--"An Unlikely Candidate"

In this second week of Andy Stanley's series, "The Unexpected Christmas", we see a contrast between every religion in the world and Christianity. Every religion in the world with the exception of Christianity teaches an approach to God based on "what I've done." People who bought into this teaching assumed an attitude of self-righteousness in order to justify a relationship with God. Others realized that they can never meet this standard and have distanced themselves from God. That was the story of Matthew, the tax collector. Matthew, though understood the teaching of Jesus. Mankind had access to God not based on what they had or had not done, but based entirely on what had been done for them. This was a brand new view and one which was destined to turn the world upside down. This was a new paradigm for mankind.

In this week's lesson, Matthew illustrated this concept by underscoring another surprising member of the linneage of Jesus. In Chapter One of Matthew, we see the reference to Judah and his brothers. Judah had eleven brothers. These brothers became the foundation for the fathers of Israel. In this week's lesson, we reference the story of Joseph. As you recall, Joseph is stripped of his multi-colored coat by his brothers and sold into slavery. Judah, one of the brothers that appears to be a leader of the brothers, influences the sale of Joseph to Egyptian traders. Later, Joseph becomes a great savior of his people and of all people in the midst of a great famine. He would make a perfect forefather of Jesus. However, God chose Judah.

Judah and Joseph are the only two brothers of the 12 brothers who have a story in the Bible. Judah gets one chapter in the Bible and his story goes from bad to creepy. Judah has three kids, one of whom married Tamar. The older son of Judah did evil in the sight of the Lord and died. The second son of Judah also did evil in the sight of the Lord and died. Judah promises to take care of his son's widow, for in that day and time, a widow who was not cared for by her husband's family was left destitute. Tamar, however, dresses as a temple prostitute and Judah hires her for her services. As a pledge for his payment, Tamar asks Judah for his seal and his staff. Three months later, when Judah is informed of his daughter-in-law's illegitimate pregnancy, he is prepared to enforce the Mosaic law requiring the death of such a woman. Tamar reveals to Judah her possession of the signature seal and the staff and Judah quickly changes his mind about the death penalty.

Judah became a part of the family line that brought Jesus into this world! Judah was a picture of you and me. He was a picture of someone who deserved one thing and got another. He is the picture of a person learning that God's grace is available even to people who have not made themselves available to God. Joseph gave to Judah (and all his brothers) the opposite of what they deserved. God chose Judah through whom He brought His son into this world.

Never has anyone ever been expected to come to God on the platform of their own righteousness. That has never been the plan. I'll never be at peace with God because of what I've done or what I haven't done. Throughout history, God always chose the broken. This Christmas, let's be thankful that we don't have to approach God based on what we have done or what we have not done. We get to approach God based entirely on what He did for each of us. The GIFT He sent to us is on that special night in history is an unspeakable GIFT. O, Holy Night!

THE UNEXPECTED CHRISTMAS--WEEK ONE

How many of you have taken photos at Christmas of the whole family? Such photos usually include grandmas and grandpas, aunts and uncles, brothers and sisters, sometimes gathered around the family Christmas tree or in front of some Christmas icon. The picture represents our immediate genealogy. In our Sunday School lesson this week, Andy Stanley begins a series titled "The Unexpected Christmas."

Andy begins a study of the writing of Matthew. He reminds us that Matthew was a tax collector, considered by the Jews to be one of the lowest of the lowest in the social heirarchy of the day. This is a man who paid the Roman government for the privilege of taxing the citizens at his own established tax rate, which offered him a handsome income! Yet, Jesus chose Matthew as one of his followers--one of his disciples--one of the writers of the Bible.

Matthew's writing starts off with the genealogy of Jesus. He was writing to a Jewish audience making the case that Jesus is the Son of God--answering the question of who is Jesus ultimately related to? Matthew makes the obvious connections in Jesus' linneage, Abraham, Isaac, King David those whom God chose to carry the line of Jesus. However, he also includes some other characters who were found in the linneage of Jesus. Some of the characters underscored by Matthew were similar to him in their standing among others, some had reputations that were as odious as the reputation of Matthew the tax collector, and some of the linneage of Jesus were as unexpected, undeserving, and unrighteous as he.

Matthew spent three years with Jesus. He heard Jesus teach. He saw Him perform miracles. He saw Jesus die on a cross and he stood next to an empty tomb. As he wrote the story of Jesus, he knew that shady characters carrying baggage were the point of the story he was about to tell. Sin was the issue Jesus came to address. Jesus didn't just come for sinners. He came FROM sinners. Jesus was the light coming into a world of darkness. He represented life coming into the element of death. He was the story of forgiveness in a world of condemnation. For Matthew, this story was also his story. These shady characters from the linneage of Jesus were like his people, like his friends.

When Jesus' followers questioned his relationship with Matthew, Jesus responded in Matthew 9:12, "...It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick." While this statement could have offended Matthew and his friends, Andy Stanley points out that people who are far from God know they are far from God. This was the case with Matthew. Andy says the story of Christmas is about God leaning towards those who had leaned away from God. Jesus changed the rules about who could approach God. The religious culture suggested that those who approach God must do so under the guise of what they have done. Jesus debunked this requirement for approaching God. He made it clear that we could approach God based on what HE did for us and NOT based on what we have done. The story of Christmas is about this GIFT that God gave to us. The greatest gift ever given...the Savior of the World who came from sinners, and people who could never qualify as part of Jesus' family. This Christmas, let's remember the GIFT God gave to each of us.

"An Unexpected Christmas"--COMING NEXT WEEK

For most of us, Christmas is more than one special day of the year. It is a time of the year in which we like to celebrate peace on earth, bright lights, cool air, and special music. It is a time when shopping and cooking and eating and spending time with the family become priorities. Special dishes and special songs, streets outlined with colored lights, the fragrant whiff of an evergreen tree, and the sweet aroma of fresh-baked cookies are part of our Christmas experience.

From a spiritual perspective, Christmas is about the birth of our savior. It's the story of God using everyday people to accomplish His purpose. It is about God fulfilling ancient prophesy exactly as it was written!

Here we are in October. Is it too early to begin thinking and talking about Christmas? If one looks at the calendar, one will see that there are nine weekends until Christmas (not counting Thanksgiving). I am certainly looking forward to the Christmas season--even if it is early in the year! I am looking forward to all of those Christmas experiences described above! Yet, wouldn't it be great if this Christmas was special? Wouldn't it be wonderful if we and our families and our friends and those who came into contact with us were able to experience a special annointing from God this Christmas? Wouldn't it be a blessing if we were prepared spiritually to celebrate the birth and life and teaching of our Lord in a way that brings us closer to Him and causes us to celebrate Christmas in a more Godly way than ever before?

We are fortunate to have two special Christmas message series from Andy Stanley that will cover eight of the next nine Sunday School Lessons leading up to Christmas. We will begin this series next week with a five week study of the geneaology of Jesus. We will study the Christmas Story during the next eight weeks from angles and perspectives that you and I may have never considered before. Andy Stanley will challenge us to think about Christmas with some unique thoughts about the way God brought His son into the world. I hope you will pray for God to touch us all with a special Christmas celebration that honors HIM and enables each of us to share a special Christmas spirit with those around us. Join us next week for "An Unexpected Christmas."

Embrace Your Response Ability--Part 4 Take Responsibility for Your Life

Every child in every culture has, at some point, uttered the phrase, "That's not fair." Well, life is NOT fair. Yet, we all want life to be fair some of the time. Andy Stanley suggests that we are really only concerned about life being fair when our piece of the pie is smallest. If we got the big piece of pie, we usually don't feel that life has been unfair to us. Even so, life isn't even. One guy marries into wealth and gets to enjoy the benefits of a big deer ranch. That was always my dream. When I met Cindy, I found out that her dad owned a "farm" in Anderson. Wow, I thought, my dream is coming true. Then, I found out that she stood to inherit 7 acres of a treeless, open prairie with no utilities and no infrastructure. Yet, one of my friends married a girl whose dad owns almost 2,000 acres of an old Mississippi plantation that is today prime deer and quail hunting habitat. Life's not fair.

In today's lesson, Andy observes that the unfairness, the unevenness of life often become an opportunity for irresponsible behavior. In past lessons, we learned that irresponsibility eats a hole in your soul. You begin a negative spiral as a result of this terrible confict in life. Perhaps, Ben Franklin said it best, "He that is good at making excuses is seldom good at anything else."

Andy also notes that people with a large piece of the pie, people with "extra" are often irresponsible with their bounty. The more money you have, the more you waste. The more free time you have, the more time is wasted.

Andy Stanley suggests that we ask the question, "What am I going to do with the opportunity that God gave me, regardless of the opportunity that someone else has been given?" Jesus taught this 2,000 years ago in Matthew 25. God's perspective on unevenness or unfairness of life was illustrated in the parable in Matthew 25:14. Andy describes this passage as a story that teaches a lesson about the unevenness of God. Parables were used to make a point and parables did not actually happen. In this story, the master gave one servant 5 bags of gold, another 2 bags of gold, and another 1 bag of gold. Andy calculated that each of these bags of gold represented about 20 years worth labor. Obviously, this was NOT an even distribution of wealth. As you recall, two of the servants put the money to work and doubled the master's money. Yet one of the servants, the one who was given the least gold, began to blame the master and whine when called to account for his lack of effort on the master's behalf. Notice that the master chose to take the gold from the servant who had been irresponsible and give it to the servant who had been most responsible. Was it fair?

Andy points out that everybody gets an uneven amount of opportunity in life and everybody gets held accountable for what they do with the opportunity given to them. Our job is to figure out how to leverage the opportunity we are given--great or small--to its maximum. What are we going to do with what we have? We need to look at our own bag and refuse to waste it or refuse to excuse myself because I don't have as much as others. Andy makes reference to a book by Scott Rigsby called UNTHINKABLE in which we see a double amputee become the first double amputee to cross the finish line in the Ford Ironman World Challenge in 2007.

Will you accept what's in your hand as coming from your Father in heaven and leverage it for something bigger than yourself? Remember, life's not fair. Get over it!

This is NOT the Time to Pray--Taking Responsibility for Your Life--Part 3

Have you ever heard someone try to talk themselves out of a situation they behaved themself into? As a former principal and school teacher, I heard it many times. I suspect the police officers in our class have heard many examples as well. As parents, you may have even heard your children try to talk themselves out of situations they behaved themself into.

Does such behavior ever apply to Christians? Do we ever try to talk or pray ourself out of situations we behaved ourselves into? I suspect we are all guilty of such behavior at some time in our lives. Some very religious folks have a tendency to hide behind their prayers and to match irresponsibility with prayers. For example, how many times have we disobeyed the will of God only to face the consequences of our actions, and then fell before God earnestly seeking deliverance from the consequences of our failure to follow God's will?

In today's lesson, Andy Stanley uses the story of Achan's Sin in Joshua 7 to illustrate how God's people often try to pray themselves out of situations they behaved themselves into. In Joshua 7, we learn that Achan took some of the spoils from God's great victory at Jericho after being told specifically not to take any of the spoils of victory. Achan saw a beautiful robe and silver and gold as he went through the rubble of the Israelite victory over Jericho. He coveted these things and took them even though the Lord specifically forbid such behavior.

Days later, when the Israelites attacked the small city of Ai, a city that Joshua's scouts had recommended only sending 3,000 men to attack and subdue the city, the Israelites were routed and chased from the city gate. Indeed, about thirty-six of the Israelite soldiers were killed. This caused the men of Israel to become afraid because they realized that God had not delivered Ai into their hands as they had expected. Joshua and the elders tore their clothes and fell face down to pray. At the end of the evening, the Lord told Joshua to stand up. He wasn't interested in granting the prayers of a people who had been unfaithful to him. He instructed Joshua to sanctify the people and to identify the men of Israel who had violated God's command. Achan was found to have the forbidden items. Achan and his entire family were destroyed. Many men died because Achan failed to honor God's commands. Praying to God was not sufficient to justify the irresponsible behavior of Achan. You might ask, "Was it fair that innocent Israelite warriors died as a result of Achan's sin? Was it fair that Achan's entire family was destroyed because of his sin?" Maybe not, but irresponsible behavior is almost never "fair" in the end.

Andy Stanley suggests that we don't need to pray about something that God has already addressed in His Word. You don't have to pray about it. God said to be honest. Don't pray about it, just be honest. God said to pay your taxes. You don't have to pray about it....just pay your taxes. God said not to participate in sex before marriage. One doesn't have to pray about it....just don't have sex before marriage. However, if someone fails to honor God's directives and then thinks they can pray their way out of a situation caused by their irresponsible behavior, they are sadly mistaken. Andy says, "If you are substituting prayer for taking responsibility in your life, you're an irresponsible person that prays." But, don't think that God is going to bail you out of a sticky situation that you have created.

Take responsibility for your life. Act responsibly. Follow God's directives. In these matters, prayer is not necessary. As the Nike slogan says, "Just Do It." If we fail to do so, we or someone else or perhaps both will have to pay for the irresponsible behavior. We can't tolerate irresponsible behavior--in our own lives or in the lives of others. Eventually, everybody pays for irresponsible behavior

The Disproportionate Life--Part 2--Taking Responsibility for Your Life

Motivating some disengaged students is one of the most challenging tasks for educators. Given the benefits of a quality education and considering the consequences of a failed education, one might wonder why it is so difficult to motivate some young students to take advantage of the education opportunities provided to them. However, I believe that Andy Stanley provides an explanation for such behavior in this week's lesson. Unless the student has a parent holding him/her accountable for their performance, there is no immediate consequence for poor performance at school. The failed Algebra test, the poor discipline record, the undone report, and the neglected homework assignment may contribute to a poor grade or report card. However, if no one is holding the student accountable for such grade reports, there really is no immediate consequence. The student may be assigned to a tutoring session or may be placed in a slower group of students, but many students fail to even recognize such steps as negative consequences of their behavior. The same thing is true in our Christian walk. Failure to follow God's commands, a refusal to establish Him as our top priority, or an unwillingness to serve God often do not have immediate consequences. When the children of Israel questioned God and complained about His provision in the desert, there were not always immediate consequences. However, in the long run, all of the group with the exception of Joshua and Caleb died in the desert and never experienced the promised land. We learn another very important principle in this week's lesson: "Whatever a man soweth, that shall he reap." Even though many of the Children of Israel failed to experience immediate consequences, they all suffered the negative consequences of failing to serve and honor God appropriately.

This timeless law of nature applies to all areas of life; physical, intellectual, relational, and spiritual. In our spiritual life, failure to honor God and failure to submit to His direction ALWAYS generate negative consequences. There may even be some who question the validity of this law. They see others flagrantly violating the laws of God, living in sin, and still flourishing by the standards of today's society. Yet, as Andy points out in today's lesson, "Whatever a man soweth, that shall he reap" is a spiritual law that has no limits in time. It applies today just as it did for the children of Israel 2000 years ago. Therefore, irresponsible behavior WILL result in negative consequences sooner or later.

Andy shared a saying from his dad, Charles Stanley, in this week's discussion. According to his son, Charles said, "You always reap later and greater." "Later" is why we tend to give up too soon. "Later" is why we sometimes envy irresponsible people. However, when the consequences for irresponsible behavior finally do manifest themselves in our lives, they are not always commensurate with the irresponsible act. In many cases, the consequences are exponentially greater than the original failure. Andy says, "Don't expect fair! Don't expect just! And, don't blame God!" Think about it! Isn't this true?

However, this week's lesson also provides sound advice for us as we recognize our irresponsible behavior. The first piece of advice is to "own your slice of the pie--no matter how small." In other words, take responsibility for your part in the issue or conflict, no matter how small it might be. Secondly, begin to do the things you should have been doing all along. The "later-greater" principle is also true for responsible behavior. If it is true that the consequences for irresponsible behavior are often not commensurate with the original sin, it is also true that the rewards of responsible behavior over time are often magnified as well.

The unmotivated school child has not accepted this timeless law of nature and of the spiritual world. Because the child experiences no immediate consequences, he cannot see the consequences that will eventually overtake him. As Children of God, it is easy to fall into the same trap. Study the words and meaning of Galatians 6:6-9 this week. Take responsibility for your piece of the pie. Begin doing what you should have been doing all along. Our God is an awesome God. You may be surprised to see the blessings that come! See you in Sunday School!

Welcome Back, Andy Stanley--Taking Responsibility for Your Life

Diabetes is rampant among men and women in our society, obesity has been recognized as a national crisis, heart disease is the number one killer among men and is not far behind in women, the divorce rate soars, and the percentage of unwed mothers in America is appalling. Prison construction is at an all-time high and the prison population continues to grow. All of these maladies are related to lifestyle decisions and our failure as individuals and as a society to take responsibility for our actions and to be responsible for our lives.
In today's lesson, Andy Stanley begins a series entitled, "Taking Responsibility for Your Life." Part I has the subtitle, "Let the Blames Begin." During the lesson, Andy asks the question, "Am I taking responsibility for my life...REALLY?"
Andy suggests that it is almost impossible to see in the mirror. However, our whole culture is becoming less and less responsible. For many of us, we have adopted the creed, "I have the right to be irresponsible, but you don't have the right to hold me accountable...and, oh, by the way, you are also responsible to foot the bill or clean up the mess for my irresponsibility." Wow! Isn't that attitude so common today?
Andy Stanley also reinforces another principle in today's discussion: "What gets rewarded, gets repeated." Therefore, if, as a culture, we tend to reward certain behaviors, those behaviors will tend to be repeated. If we reward those who refuse to work with free food, free education, free housing, free transportation, etc., more and more people are likely to refuse to work. Andy also brings out the fact that irresponsibility can be contagious. However, anytime an individual, a group, or a family acts irresponsibly, somebody else ALWAYS has to come along to shoulder the responsibility and carry the burden. In the case of runaway rates of health problems such as diabetes, obesity, and heart disease, we have seen our health care system overloaded and we have experienced unsustainable rates of increase in healthcare costs and insurance rates designed to meet the requirements of such costs. The government has felt a need to intervene in this area and we have seen the consequences. Healthcare providers are having their hands tied and are being limited in their practice by the dictates of Medicare and other government interventions. Unwed mothers are often driven to poverty and the government is compelled to provide basic food provisions, medical attention, housing assistance, and other basic necessities. Yes, someone or some group always has to step in to shoulder the burden when we act irresponsibly.
In today's discussion, Andy makes the point that each of us is responsible ultimately to our Heavenly Father. As Christians, we were created to e responsible. In Genesis 1:27-28 we see the first example of God's expectation that His children have respopnsibilities. We are happiest when we have responsibility and we are in compliance with that responsibility. Irresponsible behavior always creates conflict according to Andy Stanley in today's lesson. Blame is another form of irresponsibility according to Andy. Therefore, we should take responsibility for our own actions, refuse to get involved in the blame game, and seek diligently to meet our responsibility to our Heavenly Father. In doing so, we will be meeting all other responsibilities in our life. Are you being responsible for your life....really?


PLANS FOR SUNDAY SCHOOL CURRICULUM:
We will be using Andy Stanley material at least for the next five or six months. This series, "Taking responsibility for your Life" will last approximately four weeks.
Then, we will begin two Andy Stanley series that will last eight weeks and will take us to Christmas. They are both designed to lead our thinking and our worship up to and through the Christmas season. The first Christmas series is entitled, "An Unexpected Christmas" in which Andy goes through the unlikely family tree of Jesus. Finally, during the last three weeks leading to Christmas, we will engage in a series called "The Thrill of Hope," in which Andy takes us through the story of Zechariah, personalizes our own Christmas Story, and then reiterates Luke's story of Christmas. I think we will find these weeks ahead to be exciting, enjoyable, and thought-provoking. Most of all, I hope that this time that we will be spending together with one of the truly great Bible Teachers of our time will bring us to a season of worship, to a time of Honoring God, and to a time of deep personal introspection. I look foward to joining you on this journey! See you in Sunday School!

New Testament Prophecy--Jesus Our Victorious King

Several years ago, my family and I visited Yellowstone National Park. I remember pulling off the road at one point and walking down a short path to view a mighty waterfall. Even though we were a good distance from the actual flowing water, the roar of moving water was so intense that one could not hear anything else. The roar of the water literally drowned out all other noise. In today's lesson, the voice of God is compared to the sound of "many waters." In other words, the almighty, all-powerful God of the universe is described as the ultimate victor in the confrontation of good against evil, the struggle of the righteous against the unrighteous, and the battle of light versus darkness.
We were made for peace. In Philippians 2:9-10, we are told that God highly exalted His own son and bestowed upon Him the name which is above every name so that at the name of Jesus every knee will bow, of those who are in heaven, on earth, and under the earth. The Scripture makes it abundantly clear that we are all made to honor and worship Him. Yet, throughout the ages, we have experienced divisions, disagreements, and wars. In Genesis 14, we are introduced to the word "War" for the first time and since that time, millions have died and suffered in wars around the world.

Our lesson today focuses on the New Testament Prophecy found in the book of Revelation. Revelation is a book of incredible hope for those who love Jesus. It describes the outcome of the final war. It provides a vision of Jesus as the Mighty King, the Lord of Lords, the King of Kings. In the book of Revelation, John, the apostle of Jesus, shares a vision of Jesus with the seven churches. Perhaps, one of the most relevant exhortations made in this sacred scripture is found in Revelation 3:15-16. In this selection, Jesus warns the church that they have become neither hot nor cold and that he is about to spew them from His mouth.

The last book of the Bible further predicts the events that will occur at the end of time when God decides to end the war of good against evil, to terminate the competition between purity and sin. During our lesson today, our host points to four signs that the end may be near:
1. The very existence of the nation of Israel is a precursor to the coming of Christ for the second time.
2. A period of intense spiritual deception as described in 1 Timothy 4:1 seems to also provide evidece that the time of deliverance may be near.
3. A time of intense and progressive moral decline is also an indicator that Jesus may be on His way soon. The description provided in 2 Timothy 3: 1-5 seems to reinforce this possibility.
4. Finally, an increased intolerance of the Truth as described in 2 Timothy 4:1-4 is another good indicator to suggest the time of Jesus return and God's ultimate Victory is on the horizon and could occur soon.

However, whether Jesus returns and the events of Revelation occur today or tomorrow or a thousand years from now, we can be sure, "Our God Reigns!" Think about the power of the voice of God the next time you get near a powerful waterfall! Our God Reigns. The next time you see evil, remember, "Our God reigns." Regardless of how dark it gets, our deliverace is near!

Jesus Our Teacher--Lesson 5

"We behave as we behave because we believe as we believe." Think about this quote. Isn't it the truth? If we truly believe that it is important to spend time in the Word, we will make time to read the Bible. If we believe that God honors prayer, we will ensure time for daily prayer. Today's lesson reinforces this truth.
The New Testament writings cover Romans through Jude. These books are letters to the early church and their relevance for us has not diminished in two thousand years. There are 21 letters of which Paul wrote 13. Nine of these were directed to churches that were dealing with various issues of immorality and persecution. The letters were written to the churches and to us as lessons of instruction, correction, and encouragement.
This section of the Bible is divided into three areas by the presenters of today's lesson. They are identified as the 3 D's: Doctrine, Discipline, and Deceit. Biblical Doctrine teaches us what to believe about God and us. We learn that God is a loving God (see 1 John 4:8 and 1 Cor. 13). The proof of our love of God is seen in our obedience to His Word.
Spritual discipline includes those actions that we take as believers to mature in our faith. A book titled Celebration of Discipline by Richard Foster was referenced in today's lesson. In his book, Foster describes three different kinds of discipline. The first is "Inward Discipline" which focuses on personal examination and change. These disciplines include meditation, prayer, fasting,and studying. The second is "External Discipline" which focuses on making the world a better place to live. This discipline requires service and evangelism. "Corporate Discipline" is the third component of today's lesson outline. Corporate discipline is designed to bring us closer to each other and most importantly, closer to God.
Our lesson facilitator today shared several of her personal strategies for prayer. She mentioned that she finds time for prayer before the day gets busy, she prays aloud, and prays on her knees. She also mentioned that she prays the scripture. These are some great strategies for regular prayer.
The final "D" in today's lesson addresses the issue of deceit. The last 8 letters of this section address this issue of false teaching that appeared to be problematic in the early church just as it is today. The letters were warnings against adding to the Woird of God or taking away from God's teaching. Also, the lesson facilitator makes the point that it is important to know the truth so that we can recognize false teaching when it occurs around us. Here is a list of verses referenced in today's lesson: John 14:6, Ephesians 6:2, Romans 12:2, Titus 2:3-5, Hebrews 12:5-11, Ephesians 6: 11-17, and Col. 3:12. Let's all keep the doctrine of the Bible in our hearts and minds and practice the disciplines of the Bible in order to accomplish this task and let's be prepared for the false teaching of Satan and the world. have a great week....and, GIG'EM, Aggies!

Jesus Our Savior--Week 4 Invincible Love, Invisible War

"Not one of us will get out of here alive." This quote came from today's lesson which began in a cemetery. Yes, it is true. We will all die someday. The wages of sin is death and we will all pay that price unless we live until Jesus returns. The discussion today focuses on the first five books of the New Testament. The Gospel writers and the book of Acts tells about the fulfillment of prophecy. There was a span of four hundred years between the old testament prophets and the birth of a savior in the New Testament books of history.
We have likely all heard the argument from naysayers and non-believers that the Bible contradicts itself, especially when one compares the eyewitness accouns of the Gospel writers as they described the birth, life, death, and resurrection of Jesus. However, today's facilitators did an excellent job of explaining the differences in the details of the events described by different writers of the Bible. He used the analogy of an accident occurring in an intersection with witnesses on each corner of the intersection. As a result of the unique vantage point of each witness, and as a result of each witnesses' individual interests and knowledge and experiences, and, since each author was speaking to a different audience, it is understandable that small discrepancies in the descriptions would occur. Yet the facts of the case and the important realities of the events are not disputed and never have been!
Another important concept outlined in today's discussion: "God lives in the pauses." Psalm 46:10 encourages us to "Be still and know that I am God." Our speaker today emphsizes the importance of waiting to take action, of allowing time between a stimulus event and our response. Such waiting will help us to respond in a more Godly manner.
We also saw in today's lesson the importance of being able to quote the scripture of God. Using Jesus as an example, the speaker told of the temptations that the devil laid before Jesus and how Jesus overcame those temptations by quoting scripture. However, we learned also that we must be cautious of Satan quoting scripture and using half-truths to deceive us. Satan also takes the scripture out of context. It was said in today's lesson, "Scripture taken out of context is simply pretense."
Finally, we enjoyed a short discussion on the evidence of the resurrection. First, the earliest followers of Jesus who would have been eyewitnesses to this event have steadfastly described the event and have reported their personal interactions with the risen savior. Many of these early followers actually died as a result of their refusal to refute the resurrection. Had the resurrection not been true, they would likely have been much more resistant to the idea of dying for this cause.
The introduction and discussion of the Holy Spirit concluded today's lesson. As we follow Jesus and seek to be more like Him, we will become more like Him as the Holy Spirit guides our minds and bodies.
Have a great and blessed week.

God is Our Judge: Week 3

Who would you like to serve as the judge if you were accused of some wrongdoing? What traits would you like to see in your judge? Would you want him/her to be fair and honest? You probably would prefer that the judge have integrity and would not be susceptible to bribes and outside influences that may cause him/her to judge you unfairly. Would you hope that he/she had knowledge of the law and experience in the interpretation of legal issues? In today's lesson, we consider the 17 books of Prophecy in which God declares that He is our judge.
In this section of God's Word, we see that God sends His prophets with a message for His people. The people have fallen away from God and have slid into lives of sin, violence, and bloodshed. God repeatedly sends His prophet to warn a hard-hearted people of His judgement and punishment if they continue to disobey and dishonor Him. Part of the prophetical message includes an invitation to repent and to turn away from the sin that is destroying the country. God's message continues to offer forgiveness and restoration of their relationship with Him if they will repent from their sins and turn away from their sinful lifestyles and behavior.
The books of prophecy illustrate God's faithfulness. God ALWAYS does exactly what He says he is going to do. We see examples of fulfilled prophecy in these books of the Bible and we also see examples of prophecy that is yet to be fulfilled. Either way, we can rest assured, God will fulfill prophecy just as He says He will.
The books of prophecy are a great way to introduce people to the future. God depends on His children to know the prophecy and how it impacts us today. Remember, God is a Judge. There will be justice. God's righteousness will prevail.

BACK TO SCHOOL SWIMMING PARTY: After church on Sunday, August 21, I hope you will bring lunch for your family and join us for lunch at the Emerald Forest Swimming Pool. We can eat lunch in the air conditioned comfort of the pool clubhouse. After we eat lunch, the pool will be available for kids and parents from 1:30 p.m. until 3:30 p.m. Bring your sunscreen, floaties, water cannons, etc. and come join the fun for one last time before beginning the school schedule this week.

WISDOM--Lesson 2 "Invincible Love, Invisible War"

This week, our Sunday School study takes us to consider the concept of "wisdom". As we consider wisdom, we think about intelligence and discernment and knowledge. The lesson starts out in a library. As we all know, the library is filled with "How-To" books on nearly every topic conceivable. The problem with this kind of wisdom is that it is man's wisdom. For example, in the 18th and early 19th centuries, medical books suggested making cuts on an ill person in order to "bleed" the illness from one's body. Leeches were recommended as a means of sucking blood from a sick person in order to bring healing. In 19th century London, England, when cholera was devastating the population, killing thousands of people, the city government correctly determined that the source of the deadly illness was the accumulation of human waste and animal waste in a crowded, dirty environment in which there were no sanitary treatment procedures. In order to solve the dilemma, the city dumpted tons of waste into the Thames River, thereby polluting the entire water system and exponentially increasing the deaths due to Cholera. Clearly, man's wisdom is not always true and it often changes over time and circumstances. But, is there a book of wisdom that stands the test of time? Is there a book of wisdom that can be counted on to be accurate and true?
Pastor Tom Jones defines wisdom in this week's lesson as "good sense, the exercise of good judgement." Godly wisdom is described as "a knowledge, understanding, and sense of God's own heart." Check out the following scripture to learn more about what God's Word says about wisdom: Proverbs 1:5, Psalm 111:10, and Acts 13:22. The Hebrew word for wisdom means skills for living. The act of applying God's Word to our own life gives us a sense of God's own will and way in our lives.
Interestingly enough, the presenters of this week's lesson suggest that these are learned skills. They are not something that you and I are born with or that we inherit. Job 28, Psalm 111, and Proverbs 9 all provide examples of how we can learn wisdom. Wisdom is knowledge applied to our own lives. Understanding of God's will and direction in our lives is tied to our obedience. The more obedient we become, the more we understand. Wow. Having trouble understanding God? Try being more obedient. You may find that your understanding increases dramatically.
The lesson identifies three realities of suffering:
1. No one is exempt from suffering.
2. We don't often have control over the causes and consequences of our suffering.
3. We can CHOOSE how we will face suffering and how we will persevere.
Make the decision AHEAD of TIME. I loved the quote, "God is NEVER late, but seldom early." It has been said that you are either in a battle, coming out of a battle, or going into a battle. Either way, you need to be prepared with God's wisdom and with decisions made ahead of time about how you will respond and persevere.

Best advice from today's lesson: Go to God's Word whatever the season of your life. Whatever difficulty you may be facing, God's Word provides wisdom and discernment. Seek His guidance in His Word. Amen. Have a great week.

Invincible Love, Invisible War--Lesson One--Our Sovereign King

Today, we began a new series. The series is a study of the Word of God. It breaks the Bible into six divisions, the first being the History of the Old Testament--the first 17 books of the Bible. In this review, we learn that the Bible over a period of 1500 years, has more than 40 authors, was written on three continents (Asia, Africa, and Europe) and in three languages (Hebrew, Greek, and Aramaic). Even with all this diversity, there is one constant theme throughout the Bible. Indeed, our God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. The Bible tells us that ALL scripture was inspired by God (2Timothy 3:16). The Bible was the first book to be mechanically printed and is the most widely distributed book ever written!
In today's lesson, we were given a summary of the first 17 books of the Bible. The first chapters of this great book help us to understand that God created everything out of nothing! God was at work before we got here and He had a plan for us before time even began. Hard to fathom isn't it? Today's lesson also included a discussion on sin. We learned that the word "sin" simply means "to miss the mark." We also learned that from the very first sin, God associated the shedding of innocent blood with sin. The three major consequences of sin were reviewed: 1. death, 2. estrangement or separation from God, 3. shame.
We then learn of God's grand plan for our salvation even though we have missed the mark and fallen short of the glory of God. We also saw in today's lesson how the world (the system of man-made rules and institutions) tends to influence us against God. Our own flesh has become our own worst enemy. We desire to do things that are against God's will. The World system has fashioned hooks that snag our flesh.
We see how the early Christians experienced the same obstacles. God's people wanted a king when they did not need a king. Yet the world system led them to request a king. Out of 39 kings that ruled the people of God, only 8 of them were "good" kings and even those 8 had issues with God. A loving God disciplines His children. Therefore, throughout history, we have seen God at work disciplining His Children. And yet, He also loves his children. We saw in today's lesson the tremendous patience that God has demonstrated in his love for His children and we were shown that God's plan, His Sovereign Plan is unfolding even in our lives. Thank God for His Sovereign Power.

Here are some thoughts from the workbook that may help you to understand the enemy with which we are in spiritual warfare.

Satan is a creation of God. (Genesis 3:1)
Satan can tempt us or fill our hearts with evil desires. (IChron 21:1), (Luke 4:1-2), (Acts 5:3)
Satan has a kingdom in conflict with God's kingdom. (Luke 11: 18, 20)
Satan is a ruler men can choose to follow: (I TIM 5: 15), (2 Tim 2:26), (Eph. 4:27)
Satan can cause illness or tribulation. (Luke 13: 11, 16)
Satan is a liar and murderer. (John 8:44)
Satan's end has already been decreed by God. (Matthew 25:41)

END OF SUMMER SWIMMING PARTY
We are planning to have one last summer swimming party on August 21 after church. We are going to check Monday to see if we can rent the pool again for our class on Sunday, August 21. If it is available, we will set up the meeting room at Emerald Forest Pool for a potluck lunch after church and then swimming from 1:00-4:00 p.m. We will let you know as soon as we find out if the pool is available. JC

Prayer Link AND Workbook Order Information

We will begin a new series next week called, "Invincible Love, Invisible War". If you would like to learn more about this series, go to https://amazingcollectionstore.com/user/login

At the top of the page, you will see a label for "Store". Choose Store and then scroll down the left side until you see the title, "Invincible Love, Invisible War." This will bring you to a picture of the workbook. Click on the title and it will take you to an overview of the study and, if you have created an account on the original page, an opportunity to purchase a workbook if you choose. The workbook costs $14.99 plus tax and shipping. You are not required to create an account just to review the material. If you wish to purchase, you will need to create an account or you could order by calling 1-888-366-3460.

You certainly don't need a workbook to complete the study. However, for some folks, the workbook helps them complete the study.
This morning, during our discussion, Bo Miles shared a list of 31 virtures to pray for our children. Access the list at the website below. If the link doesn't work, just type in www.praymag.com

It Does Matter How You Play the Game--Empathy

Today's lesson was the conclusion of the Parenting by Design series. In today's lesson, our presenter calls empathy the glue that holds the parenting process together. Without empathy, the principles of Parenting by Design lose their effectiveness. God's unconditional empathy for His children is summed up best in Romans 5:8: "But God demonstrates His own love for us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." Despite our rebellion, Jesus laid down His life to secure our relationship with God. He is the perfect example for our relationship with our own children. The perfect parent says, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." (Hebrews 13:5)

We have learned to give our kids choices and to administer consequences when they violate a boundary. It is equally important that our entire interaction with our kids reflect the same empathy that God demonstrated in His Word. When you are able to display that kind of unconditional love by offering choices and delivering consequences with empathy, your child will know that no bad choice can separate him from your love. It makes a consequence seem bearable. With empathy, you can stay connected with your child while he is enduring a consequence and open the door to exploring motives behind his choices. The trust that empathy builds gives you that opportunity.

What does it look like when we display a lack of empathy toward our children? Lack of empathy is often expressed in sarcasm, judgment, condemnation, condescension, belittling, or resentment. It can show up in denying or dismissing a child's emotional response to a tough situation. Even when we are trying our best to help, we can communicate a lack of empathy by rushing to solve the problem.

Delivering consequences with empathy rather than anger or disrespect communicates two things--unconditional love and confidence that the child is capable of solving the problem for himself. Empathy conquers a fear of consequences.

Empathy is not the same thing as praise. Praise focuses on a result. Empathy focuses on a process. Separate the process from the result. That way, children do not learn that they must perform at a certain level for their parents to approve of them.

Finally, as parents, we need to be prepared to admit our failures and to ask our children to forgive us when we make bad choices related to parenting. God is our perfect model. The closer we are able to emulate him in our efforts to raise our own children, the more likely we will be to be able to discipline, correct, land reinforce our children's behavior with empathy.

During our discussion this morning, Bo Miles shared a list of virtues to pray for our children. The entire list can be accessed at the following website:

In addition, we discussed hosting the putt putt station at the fall festival again this year. After class, a few of us discussed the possibility of one last swimming party at the end of summer. We will study this possibility and look for availability and dates. If anyone has any other ideas for a class get-together, let us know.

NEXT WEEK: We begin "Invincible Love, Invisible War". See you then. Have a great week.

Jimmy and Cindy

Worksheet for Identifying Consequences

If you were looking for the headings to the columns on the worksheet designed to help you identify consequences in the blog, I apologize. The format on this blog will not allow me to print columns in any shape or form. The column titles came out garbled in the blog today. So, here is another effort. I am going to try to attach a copy of this worksheet and hope it works. Here goes.

July 24, 2011--Lesson Seven "Consequences"

In today's lesson, we examined the importance of givng consequences consistently and considered the kinds of consequences that are most effective. Chris opened the lesson by mentioning that many of you have small children and that many have small, compliant children. For these parents, it may be difficult for them to envision their children stepping over the discipline boundary in a significant way. He emphasized that all children will eventually step over the boundary just as we step over the boundary with our Heavenly Father. When this occurs, consequences should and will follow.

The first important point to consider in delivering consequences for behavior is to be sure that consequences are consistently delivered. Failure to act consistently in the delivery of consequences is very confusing to a child. If consequences are assigned sometimes and not assigned at other times, the discipline lessons are significantly diminished. According to the Groffs, consistently implementing consequences for bad behavior with empathy communicates love for the child.

Indeed, when God's servant Moses struck the rock causing water to flow in the desert, and accepted the glory for the provision of water, God felt compelled to issue a consequence for this behavior, resulting in Moses not being able to enter the promised land. Even though Moses was a great man of God and even though he had served God well, God assigned consequences to his behavior. It is quite obvious that sin must be addressed.

Chris stated that many of us tend to default to one particular consequence. In many families with older kids, that default consequence is often grounding the child. However, the Groffs teach that varying the consequences to match the situation is more effective in teaching specific lessons. Sometimes, consequences occur naturally. If your child forgets his lunch, hunger is a natural consequence of such action. There will be times when you will need to construct a consequence. In such cases, the Groffs recommend using one's imagination to identify a consequence that might teach a better lesson than the old "default" consequence.

Chris also encourages us to evaluate our consequences. If the consequence is too hard, the lesson to the child is diminished. If it is too lenient, there is no learning experience at all.

Be prepared! Kids will complain about consequences and our teacher suggests that some complaining is acceptable and even expected. Most of us grumble when we receive a ticket, even if the ticket was well-deserved. Kids are no different. However, we should be careful to distinguish between harmless complaining and disrespectt. If the comments are about the punishment and the target of the comments is the situation or the consequence, that is acceptable. However, if the target of the comment is you or your spouse, that may be stepping over the boundary and may be considered disrespectful. If disrespect occurs, consequences should be implemented, again with appropriate empathy.

According to Chris Groff, poor choices should be addressed immediately and inappropriate behavior should be pointed out. However, it is appropriate to delay the consequence, giving the child time to think about his behavior to to consider other responses that he might have chosen. The lesson today makes reference to a worksheet to help you identify possible consequences for specific behavior. Here are the four columns of the workbook:

Things your child Things your child Things you do Things that can be
does not like to do likes to do as favors exchanged for your time,
effort, and money.

Finally, our teacher describes "exploration" as the follow-up to consequences. This step should be taken only after the emotions are passed--not in the heat of the moment when emotions are running high.

NEXT WEEK: Lesson 8--Empathy

Thanks to all of you who brought breakfast food this morning and thanks for the diaper supply for the Halberts. As we mentioned, we will begin a new series in two weeks called, "Invincible Love, Invisible War". If you would like to learn more about this series, go to https://amazingcollectionstore.com/user/login

At the top of the page, you will see a label for "Store". Choose Store and then scroll down the left side until you see the title, "Invincible Love, Invisible War." This will bring you to a picture of the workbook. Click on the title and it will take you to an overview of the study and, if you have created an account on the original page, an opportunity to purchase a workbook if you choose. The workbook costs $14.99 plus tax and shipping. You are not required to create an account just to review the material. If you wish to purchase, you will need to create an account or you could order by calling 1-888-366-3460.

You certainly don't need a workbook to complete the study. However, for some folks, the workbook helps them complete the study.

July 17--Lesson #6 "Choices Within Limits"

ANNOUNCEMENT
Please mark your calendar for next Sunday, July 24, 2011. We will be hosting a diaper shower/breakfast for the Halberts, who are expecting their fourth child soon. Please bring diapers and wipes and a breakfast dish or pastry to share. The church will provide coffee, water, and perhaps, juice?

PRAYER REQUESTS: Pray for Wesley Holmes and all our junior high students who will be on a mission trip this week in Arkansas. Pray that God will open their eyes and give them a heart for those in need--spiritually and physically. (But, isn't that a great prayer for us all? I know it is for me.) Pray for Leslie's mom, Sylvia Day who is recovering from by-pass surgery. Pray for a Boy Scout who underwent emergency appendectomy surgery this week. Pray also for our visitors this week: Shawn and Kim Reynolds. Shawn and Kim have three children: Emalee(7), Danielle(4), and Elizabeth (7 months). PRAISE REPORTS: Jessica's mom has experienced healing and Valerie received a positive medical report. Thank God for hearing our prayers and for His divine intervention.

In today's lesson from Parenting by Design, the Groffs discuss the concept of offering kids choices within limits. Chris talked about the fact that God gave his people a free choice and the fact that we often learn best by experiencing the consequences of choices, good and bad. In the case of our kids, Chris suggests that we build choices between two parameters: safety and our own values. Often, kids are more amenable to control battles and boundary setting when they have choices that are clearly under their own control.

Mr. Groff also discusses the contrast between commands and choices. We can avoid control battles often by providing our kids with more choices. As long as they choices remain within the parameters of what is safe and our own value system, they are perfectly legitimate strategies to avoid the total rebellion that often is a result of a control battle.

We had some great examples shared in class of successful efforts to provide choices for our own kids. Natalie Halbert shared a situation in which one of her children was refusing to wear clothes that Mom and Dad felt were appropriate for certain occasions and activities. They began to pick out two or three outfits and gave the child the opportunity to choose an outfit from the selected ensembles the night before. That way, there was no crisis the next morning when it came time to get dressed. Stephanie and Brian shared an example in which a child wanted to attend a party and stay out until 11:00 p.m. After ensuring that the parents hosting the party were responsible and that appropriate supervision would be present, they still had issues with the lateness of the hour. The child was given the choice of going to the party and leaving at 10:30 p.m. or not going. In this way, the child was not denied the opportunity to socialize and spend time with friends. However, appropriate limits that reflected the values of the family were implemented.

We also had a discussion about the difference between commands and choices and reiterated the fact that there are always consequences for choices, both good and bad. What an important concept for our kids to learn!

Think about these concepts and principles and their application in your own family. Perhaps, God is showing you another way to guide your kids without being overbearing and creating an attitude of hostility?

Next week, in Lesson 7, we will discuss "Consequences." I look forward to seeing you there.

The Developmental Stages--Lesson # 5

Today's lesson dealt with the developmental stages which children progress as they grow and mature. According to the Groffs, an understanding of the developmental stages helps us to have realistic expectations for our children and their behavior and helps us to understand the struggles they are facing. It also sheds light on some of the quirky things your child is likely to do and enables you to offer the kind of scaffolding he or she may need to move from one stage of development to another. In addition, knowing what your child is experiencing helps you to be empathetic. When you understand the unique challenges of each stage of the developmental process, you will be less inclined to misinterpret their actions. Understanding encourages empathy.
The Developmental Stages as outlined in today's lesson are:
I. Infant/Toddler--Ages 0-2, II. Preschool--Ages 2-6, III. Elementary--Ages 6-12, and IV. Teenage--Ages 13-18+. Within each stage, the Groffs discussed three types of development: Relational, Intellectual, and Moral.

During the first stage (Infant/Toddler), children tend to be bonding with those around them. A lack of bonding at this age can create serious problems that can be long-lasting. Fortunately, God has designed parents, and particularly mothers, in such a way that this bonding process is as pleasurable for parents as it is for the child. Because bonding is the sole focus at this stage, the bonding that occurs is pervasive. The intellectual world of a newborn is limited to what the child can physically sense. As their senses develop, their world expands, but only to the extent that they can physically perceive and interact with it. For example, when they see something it exists, but when it is hidden from view, it ceases to exist. Because these kids don't have language yet, their primary method of causing change in the environment is crying. They quickly learn that crying brings a parent and cases change. In reference to moral development, the thinking is again very simple at this age. Children of this age tend to think that whatever brings pleasure is good and whatever brings pain is bad. They are unable to comprehend things outside their physical world

During the pre-schooler stage, children begin to test boundaries as they meet people outside the family and learn to interact with them. Children at this age like to use the word "No." They are learning to separate from you ever so slightly. In the elementary stage, they are engaged heavily in information gathering and they develop a sense of fairness based on a strict set of rules. Moral decisions are based on this sense of fairness.

As they progress through the teenage years, they are likely to explore bonding again...this time outside the family. For this reason, it is not uncommon to see "puppy love" and short, but intense "romances." The pre-frontal cortex of the brain is not yet fully developed, causing teenagers to make decisions that often seen irrational. The pre-frontal cortex controls impulse decisions, delayed gratification, reasoning and risk assessment. Consequently, we often see teens taking inappropriate risks, acting on impulse, or acting in an unreasonable manner. Teens also are likely to seek acceptance and affirmation from groups with whom they are affiliated. Group interaction exposes kids to value systems other than their family's and the pressure to conform causes them to take the group's ideas very seriously. They will not take kindly to a denouncement of their group's ideology during this substage. Hopefully, toward the end of this stage, we begin to see young people developing principles as guidelines for moral decisions. When asked what the greatest commandment was, Jesus responded in Mark 12:28-31, "...Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. The second is this: Love your neighbor as yourself. There is no greater commandement than these." Christ gives two principles that should govern everything we do. Remember, at this age, you are still the most influential person in your kid's life. However, your input will be discounted if it is not provided empathetically.

Next Week: Choices Within Limits

Have a great week: Jimmy and Cindy

June 26--Boulders and Backpacks--Lesson # 4

PRAYER REQUESTS: PRE-TEENS AT CAMP THIS WEEK, JESSICA'S NEIGHBOR'S SON (NATHAN)--HEART ATTACK, PASSING OF DAD IN FAMILY WITH YOUNG CHILDREN, JIMMY'S DAD.

Today's lesson is titled, "Becoming a New Parent". The Groffs discuss the challenges of changing one's parent style to one that neither dictates nor rescues children, but rather allows children to make choices and requires them to live with the consequences of those choices. As parents, it is often hard for us to allow our children to make poor choices resulting in painful consequences.

Chris Groff describes the manipulation skills of our children when he talks about the ability to young children to "push the right buttons" to set off their parents. Our kids know our trigger points and they often delight in manipulating us to the point that we explode or engage in an out-of-control response to some behavior or attitude demonstrated by our kids. Chris and Michelle advise us as parents to stay balanced. Chris states, "Remember, the most loving thing you can provide for them [your children] is an empathetic environment where they are encouraged to struggle with a problem in order to learn long-term life lessons. Take the longest possible view of the issue and let them learn from it." Life is a process. Allowing your children to manage the process is the best gift you can give to your children.

Today's lesson is based on the teaching of two scripture verses:
Galatians 6:2--encourages us to carry each other's burdens. The word used to describe "burden" is a word that means those loads, those burdens that are crushing in weight in which one person cannot possible be successful in carrying. Galatians 6:5 encourages everyone to carry their own load. The word used to describe load refers to a load that can be managed by one person. Chris and Michelle discriminate between the two concepts by describing one as a boulder--way too large for one individual to shoulder and carry, while the other is a backkpack, specifically designed to be carried by one person and efficiently moved from place to place by one individual.

Our job as parents is to discern between the backpacks and the boulders in your child's life. Even in the case of a boulder, we should not attempt to completely take over the responsibility of dealing with the issue. We should, according to the Groffs, be an empathetic supporter, building a scaffold system to help our children deal with such issues. In the case of backpack issues, we should have the patience and courage to allow our children to struggle....and even fail in order to learn how to deal efficiently and effectively with such issues.

Let's take a look at a few examples of "backpack" issues. Chris offers three examples of backpack issues that could be left to the child. These examples include getting ready in the morning. This might include dressing oneself, eating breakfast, getting to the carpool or bus stop on time, or having supplies and books in the backpack or book satchel. Chores around the house are also examples of backpack issues. Finally, homework can be an example of a backpack issue. Of course, this one can become a boulder as well because of the long-term impact it can have on a student's academic future.

Some boulder examples include dealing with injuries and/or illnesses and the ending of relationships. Sometimes, kids need empathetic encouragers and scaffolds in order to deal with these issues.

Here are the guidelines offered by the Groffs for discerning backpack issues from boulder issues:

1. Don't do something for your child they can and should do for themselves.
2. If helping makes you feel resentful, the issue is probably a "backpack."
3. Be respectful of your child's responsibility.

A TEMPLATE FOR DEALING WITH BACKPACKS AND BOULDERS P. 46 OF PARENTING BY DESIGN WORKBOOK:

BACKPACK ISSUES BOULDER ISSUES

1. Give empathy, "How sad," or "I bet that 1. Give empathy, "How sad," or
hurts." "That sounds awful."

2. Clarify whose problem it is, "What do 2. Clarify whose problem it is,
you think you're going to do?" "What do you think..."

3. Offer choices, "Would you like to 3. Offer help, "What could I do
hear what other people your age have tried?" to help you?"
A. Offer your worst choices first. A. Ask for 3 options.
B. Go to step 4 after every choice. B. Choose one option and tweak
C. Never be afraid to run out of choices. it until you feel good about giving
it.

4. Ask how their choice will work, "How do 4. Ask how it would make them feel
you think that will work for you?" if you gave them that help, "How
would you feel if I did ______?"

5. Give the power statement, "That sounds 5. Give the promise statement,
great. Let me know how it turns out." "Then I'll do it."

6. After you have done what you
promised, re-evaluate whether the
problem is still a boulder or if it
has become a backpack.

Think of examples of boulders and backpacks in your home.

Have a great week.
Jimmy and Cindy

June 19--Lesson 3: Parental Authority

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!


Today's lesson dealt with Parental Authority or central authority in the family. In some very important ways, earthly families are models of the spiritual family. The Groffs suggest that parents are a child's first curriculum on God. In his/her early development, a child does not understand the concept of a transcendant God. However, they learn about love, provision, authority, submission, and dependence by observing and experiencing the parent/child relationship.

According to the Groffs, when a small child understands, accepts, and enjoys their parents as the central authority in their lives, they are prepared to accept and enjoy God as their ultimate central authority. They learn about the nature of a relationship with God from their relationship with their parents. Hopefully, as they grow, they will become less and less dependent on their natural parents and more and more dependent on the Perfect Parent instead.

The Groffs refer to parenting as a "team sport." In other words, both parents have to be on the same page when it comes to interaction, discipline, consequences, and the exercise of authority in the family. As Chris says, "Kids are adept at discovering cracks in the parental coalition, and you should be aware of their ability to spot a weakness." He suggests that parents have "team meetings" in which they discuss issues, differences of opinion or philosophy, and the best action or communication in reference to their kids or some behavior of their kids. In talking with your spouse about the kids, he suggests that we should be empathetic and attentive listeners as our partner expresses their position. Each person in the body of Christ has different spiritual gifts. Therefore, it is not surprising to find that the husband and wife will also have different parenting skills. Chris Groff advises us to listen to one another and to discuss our views calmly in order to establish a joint response that we both can support.

God has uniquely created you to be the central authority of your family. However, this role requres a delicate balance. Being the central authority requires the judicious exercise of power that helps each member of the family grow into the person God intended them to be. Groff also makes the point that the parental exercise of power will likely be different for each child. As a parent, it is our job to determine the appropriate and unique limits for each child.

Unfortunately, in some families, the role of central authority has been unwittingly ceded to a child or to the children. This happens when we allow the child's activities to become the center of the family's life. In today's society, this reality is fairly common. We all want our kids to have meaningful experiences that will help them develop and be prepared for the challenges of life. Consequently, we sometimes, quite unaware of our actions, allow the tremendous deluge of activities and events to drive our schedules and to consume our time and energy. When this happens, it is easy for the central authority to be shifted away from you as the parents of the family.

Here are some examples of the perfect central authority shared by the Groffs:

God (as the central authority in our lives)
--Is a strong, calm authority
--Sets reasonable boundaries
--Permits any choice within those boundaries
--Lets the consequences of choices teach
--Relies on influence rather than control
--Meets us with unconditional love, regardless of our choices.

How about "Respect for Authority?" How important is it for your children to learn respect for authority? Very few of us have positions in life where we do not report to someone and do not, at some point, have to demonstrate submission to someone else in authority. Groff says that the family setting is a safe place to start practicing respect for authority.

Keep in mind also that a really good central authority will choose to EARN the respect of their children. They use power in a respectful and empathetic way.

As mentioned previously, in today's fast-paced society, it is not uncommon for a child's calendar to become the central authority in a family. In such situations, children often learn entitlement. If we take on their responsibilities and problems, they grow to expect it and become angry when a parent is not available to cater to their needs. This certainl is a sensitive issue since most parents want their children to be exposed to a lot of activities. Therefore, it becomes increasingly important that age and development appropriate boundaries be set and observed. Groff emphasizes that such boundaries should not be based on our own personal preferences, but on creating an environment within which you will allow your childrent to make good choices or mistakes and experience the consequences of them both.

The Groffs suggest one good indicator that we may be stepping over a boundary. They suggest that when a fun family activity becomes anxiety, this may be a clear indicator that we have crossed the boundary and that appropriate consequences should be allowed to progress.

Homework for this week:
Try to make dinnertime enjoyable. According to Groff (p.40), research shows that families who eat dinner together at least five times per week are substantially less likely to have kids who smoke, drink, lie, use drugs, have premaritial sex, or contemplate suicide. Make dinner a time for fun and sharing.

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY, DADS. HAVE A GREAT WEEK AHEAD.
JIMMY

June 12, 2011--"The Three E's of Parenting--Experience, Example, & Exploration

As we continued our 8-week video series from "Parenting by Design" by Chris and Michelle Groff and Lee Long and Mark Foster, we looked at Week 2 of the study this week. Week 2 identifies the "three E's of parenting: age-appropriate (and maturity-appropriate) experiences, our parental example, and lovingly leading our children on an exploration of the motivations driving their behavior.

I saw evidence in today's lesson that the authors of this program have not only consulted the ultimate guide to parental design, God's Holy Word, but they have also referenced some of the foundational paradigms of education as well. For example, in today's discussion, Chris Groff talked about early brain research in which the brain was dissected, making it difficult, if not impossible for research to be conducted on a living subject. However, in the past two decades, improved imaging capability has made it possible for researchers to study the brain while it is in action in a living subject. This commentary on the advances in brain research likely came from the early chapters of a book by Eric Jensen, Teaching With the Brain in Mind. During his discussion on leading explorative activities with our children, he mentioned the importance of listening to your child and repeating without emotion the child's comments. This practice is a mainstay of a discipline management strategy known as "Reality Therapy" espoused by Dr. William Glasser.

A worthy goal for our parenting is to have our kids move from dependence on us as parents to reliance on God. Our job as parents is to help kids move in that direction. Since it is "camp" time in many of our households, we took an informal survey this morning to determine the differences in parental control over our children's preparation for camp. Some parents reported that their kids were ready to pack their own bags and they allowed them to do so. Others were not comfortable with allowing their kids to pack their own bags. This is just one example of our willingness to allow our kids opportunities to experience independence. Remember, the experiences should be age-appropriate as well as maturity-appropriate. Otherwise, the learning opportunity will be wasted. For some kids, allowing them to pack their own bags for a week at camp would be a disaster. For others, it is a learrning opportunity. As parents, we are charged with the responsibility to determining the right time and the right experiences for our children. Decision-making and problem-solving are skills that are learned through practice. Like any skill, our kids need opportunities to master them.

NEWS FLASH: As I am writing this blog on Sunday afternoon, I have received a phone call from my youngest daughter informing me that she is stranded on Highway 21 on this side of Caldwell with a flat tire as she heads home. One side of me suggests that she is only 30 minutes away and that I should go handle this situation for her. However, the other side says to let her deal with this situation....it will be a great learning experience. She has AAA coverage and it is just a matter of making the call, showing her card (assuming she can find her card), and giving the technician time to find her location and mount the spare tire (also assuming that the spare is not flat). One side of me says, "Run to her aid." The other side says, "Let her handle this situation. Afterall, she is 25 years old." I share this with you as an example that these feelings of the need to control do not necessarily disappear even after your children "grow up." Of course, it IS HOT out there today...maybe I will let her take care of this--what a great learning experience.

Chris Groff asked us to view our children as "little scientists" running around conducting experiements as they grow. Certainly, there will be some mistakes. Some of these mistakes may even be painful. Yet, we must uderstand and accept that mistakes are part of the learning process. These mistakes can also be the basis for new growth and maturity. I appreciated the example shared by Kathleen and Bill Gutierrez this morning as they shared a story about their son and his involvement in scouting. It seems that Bill knew that his son would need certain materials (notebook, pen, etc.) in the meetings and that he also knew the start time of the meetings. However, he allowed his son to attend the meetings without the appropriate materials and even allowed him to go to meetings thirty minutes late in order to learn the consequences of failing to meet these expectations and to grow in his capacity to take care of himself and to act responsibly. Kathleen found out about the "experiment" and was not pleased that they were allowing their son to fail in these areas. However, as a result of his experience, their son has become responsible, bringing his own materials to meetings and scheduling the meetings in a timely manner. A hard lesson to learn? Possibly, but it was learned under the watchful parameters of a Mom and Dad who desperately wanted their son to learn responsible behavior. Years from now, they will be glad they allowed this to happen in order to teach a valuable lesson to their son.


James 1: 2-4 says: "Consider it all joy, my brethern, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him."

The four essential ingredients of experience that encourage growth and maturity in children:
1. Kids should have age-appropriate problems to solve.
2. They should be allowed to try to solve these problems on their own.
3. They should be allowed to learn from the consequences of their problem-solving efforts, successful or not.
4. They should be given just the amount of support they need to solve the problem for themselves. In other words, it is healthy to struggle a little. If we take the problem from them, they learn very little.

The Bible tells us that trials develop perseverance, wisdom and dependence on God. When we recognize the eternal value of struggles, it helps us to walk alongside our kids with empathy and let them experience the consequences of their choices. Children who have opportunities to solve problems are more likely to develop responsibility, respect, resourcefulness and an understanding of the spiritual power available to them.

Chris and Michelle also discuss the values of chores around the house. According to the Groffs, chores teach teamwork, time management, resource management, and all kinds of other skills kids will need when they leave home. Kids also get a sense of accomplishment and value as they learn and use new skills. Is it possible that we are shirking our responsibility as parents when we don't give our kids these opportunities to contribute?

Here are some Proverbs cited in the workbook that relate to chores:

Proverbs 13:4 "The sluggard craves and gets nothing, but the desires of the diligent are fully satisfied."
Proverbs 18:9 "One who is slack in his work is brother to one who destroys."
Proverbs 21:25 "The sluggard's craving will be the death of him, because his hands refuse to work. All day long he craves for more, but the righteous give without sparing."

The second E in our lesson stands for example. The way you live your life is influencing your kids. They are watching everything you do. As a result, you must model the qualities you want to see in your children. I like this quote from C.H. Spurgeon that was included in the workbook: "If we walk before the Lord with integrity, we shall do more to bless our descendants than if we bequeathed them large estates." Teaching the Word is important, but living the Word is more important.

James 1:22 says, "Do not merely listen to the Word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says." Groff states, "You are your kids' first curriculum on the characteristics of a 'father'. Consequently, your example will influence how they perceive their heavenly father." WOW. What a responsibility! Here are some ways to be a positive model for your kids:
1. Model humility
2. Facing and solving problems
3. Giving and receiving empathy
4. Learning from consequences

The third E stands for exploration. In the Bible, God often asks questions to encourage His people to explore their hearts. Jesus wanted people to respond to God in ways that go beyond mere obedience. Isn't this what we want for our children?

Some Biblical examples of exploration are:
After Adam and Eve had eaten the fruit, God asks Adam, "Where are you?" (Gen. 3:9) and "Who told you that you were naked?" Have you eaten from the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?" (Gen. 3:11). Clearly, God knew the answers to these questions. He was not asking for His sake, but rather to cause Adam and Eve to explore themselves and their motivations.

In 1 Kings 1:5-6, "Now Adonijah the son of Haggith exalted himself, saying, "I will be king." So he prepared himself chariots and horsemen with fifty men to run before him. His father had never crossed him at any time by asking, "Why have you done so?" David is criticized for not asking his fourth son, Adonijah, thought provoking questions about his behavior.

This week, give your kids more age-appropriate choices/experiences and allow them to experience the consequences of their choices. If the chance arises, try exploration with empathy.

NEXT WEEK: Parental Authority

Welcome to Jason and Sumar Ballard who visited with us today. The Ballards have three children, Amy (12), Tristan (9), and Halle (7).